sweetest devotion
by alverixorcustransfrogamorphus
Summary: Hecate Hardbroom. Deputy Head. Potions Mistress. Unsung Hero. "Every child deserves a champion – an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best that they can possibly be." -/ Hecate has tutored many students over the years, but none as unique as Esmerelda Hallow.


_Every child deserves a champion – an adult who will never give up on them, who understands the power of connection and insists that they become the best that they can possibly be. –_ Rita Pierson

* * *

 _sweetest devotion_

She would be lying if she said that her chest had not constricted beyond the realm of possibilities when Ada had suggested that she take on a promising student of her choice to tutor. Would be lying if she said she hadn't immediately tried to talk Ada out of the idea the second she found herself able to speak, and she definitely would be lying if she said she hadn't laid awake night after night overrun with overwhelming anxiety when Ada had shut down her protests.

How could she, Hecate, prove to be a positive influence on her students when the only experience she had with private tutors ended in a world of pain, followed by a locked door and an empty stomach. How could she possibly take one of these young, fragile girls under her wing when the scars from her time spent at Witch Training College still tingled on her arms, legs and torso. She knows all she has to do is tell Ada, to let her know why this is a bad idea and Ada will pretend it never happened, but she can't bring herself to utter the words, to see the worry that would invade Ada's kind eyes if she told her that she had attended the most notoriously scandalous school in the Witching World.

Her first student is Isla Moonshine, a talented sixth year who hoped to attend Weirdsister College the following autumn. She is firm, but fair with Isla who had a tendency to drift off in class and add her own _flair_ to spells and potions. The girl is scared at first, but the fear gradually turns to wonder and excitement as she teaches Isla potions of her own invention, spells that the girl had never dreamed of and gives her the ability to perform a transference spell before her second year of university. She works Isla hard, fighting to maintain a delicate balance of support and rigour in the lead up to the WHSC, pouring her heart and soul into the success of her student.

Hecate cries when Isla graduates as dux of her class and is subsequently accepted into the Healer Program at Weirdsister. Not straight away of course, (she would never give the other girls the satisfaction of seeing their strict potions mistress in tears) no, she cries after everyone is long gone for the summer, after Isla, giddy with happiness had rushed up to her and wrapped her arms around her waist, gratitude gushing from her lips. " _I owe this to you Miss Hardbroom. I honestly could not have done this without you."_ she cannot stop the smile from cracking over her face as Isla beams up at her and she hugs the girl back, albeit slightly awkwardly. " _You'll go onto do great things, good luck, Isla."_ she says, her parting words with her student making her voice catch in her throat. The tears come later, when she is safe in her room, away from the other teachers. She cries because she is so _unbelievably_ proud of Isla, because she was able to inspire her student in a way she was never inspired by her tutors, she cries because as much as she does not want to admit it to herself, she will miss their lessons, but most of all, she cries because she did it, she tutored a child and she didn't mess it up.

* * *

Hecate buries herself deep into the tutoring scheme in the ensuing years, throwing everything that she had at her students, pushing them, encouraging them, inspiring them. She takes them as she sees them, her instinct for spotting potential in students sees Anika Thornbush, a struggling and distracted third year through her remaining four years at Cackles, going on to study Enchantment Development at university. She picks up a fifth year, Hailey Gerricks, from the aftermath of family tragedy and turns her grades on their head, seeing her off to America to study. She turns Gaia Shortbloom's passion for potions into a career. One by one, her students thrive and succeed, and every time she sees one achieve their dream, she cannot help but transfer herself to her room and weep, for each student that succeeded under her was another brick in the wall she had been trying to build up inside of her since The Witch Training College was shut down back in her final year of school. Every successful student she had solidified the wavering thought that she had had way back when, that curses, pain, and terror did not belong in a place of learning.

It's ten years of doing personal tutoring at Cackles before Hecate finds herself almost sold to the possibility of taking on a first year. She's never taken on the eleven or twelve year olds' before, they were far too rowdy and untrained. It was hard to spot potential in them when they're busy smashing cauldrons from adding too many eyes of newt to their sneezing solutions. But from the very first moment she laid eyes on her, Hecate knew that Esmerelda Hallow had potential, a thought only reaffirmed by the new school record she had set, 100% in the written exam, and 98% in the practical. She's a little hesitant at first, not instantly rushing into taking her on but preferring to watch, to gauge the girl's clearly natural talent. It only takes two weeks before Hecate approaches the eleven-year-old after seeing her diligence, her knowledge and her talent unfold before her in classes. And the week after, they begin their lessons.

Esmerelda is more talented than the rest of her students put together. By half term, she has mastered level twelve transformation spells, by Christmas she's writing essays to rival those of the fourth years, and by the end of the school year she's able to recall third year advanced potions recipes from memory, and concoct them perfectly. Although she remains largely stoic with her students, she cannot help but let her pride at Esmerelda's achievements shine through. The girl is like a sponge, mastering everything Hecate threw at her with ease, and asking extremely intelligent questions beyond those of an eleven-year-old when she did not understand.

Esmerelda is at the end of her second year when she enquires about transference spells. And before Hecate knows what she's doing, she's teaching a mere twelve-year-old the complex magic intended for those in their second year of university. The difficulty of the spell frustrates Esmerelda at first, so used to being able to master magic within two or three tries, she is nearly in tears when she hasn't completed a successful transference at the end of their first lesson.

"It is time to go now, Esmerelda," she says tiredly as the girl stands at the opposite end of the classroom, eyes squeezed shut in what must have been the thousandth time she had tried.

"Five more minutes, Miss Hardbroom, please!" Esmerelda says, "I know I can do it. I'm nearly there!"

"Esmerelda, you have done brilliantly already," Hecate says, rising from her chair and closing the texts they had been studying to help Esmerelda make sense of the spell, "This is very complex magic, well beyond your level of expertise. I was probably foolish to have introduced you to it so early."

"Please don't make me stop Miss Hardbroom," Esmerelda pleads, "I can master this, I promise I can."

Hecate smiles softly, still taken aback, even after two years, at how eager Esmerelda was to continue improving and developing her magic.

"I believe you can," she says, "But not now, term was over five hours ago. I'm sure your parents are wondering why you haven't come home for summer yet."

Esmerelda gives her a small smile and puts a hand on the book on the desk, "Can I take this with me to read over the summer?" she asks gingerly, aware of how protective Hecate was over her personal texts. Hecate battles with herself for a moment.

"I don't see why not," she says eventually, "however I must insist that you make sure you return it to me in the exact condition it is in right now."

Esmerelda nods happily, picking the book up carefully and stowing it in her bag.

* * *

Hecate doesn't know why she's surprised when Esmerelda transfers into the staff room at the start of Selection Day, a smile plastered across her face at her achievement. Ada is all congratulations and fuss as the other teachers crowd around, fawning over Esmerelda's talent. But through it all, Esmerelda only had eyes for Hecate, searching out her tutor's approval. Hecate smiles and nods at her once, the gesture giving Esmerelda all the approval she needs, excitedly talking to her other teachers about how much she had been practicing to master the spell in time for the new school year, and practically bubbling with excitement over the fact that her younger sister, Ethel, would be coming to the school for her Selection Day later.

Hecate observes the younger Hallow closely throughout the day, well as much as she could with the shenanigans surrounding the Mildred Hubble girl. She doesn't know what she expects, but it becomes clear to her as the day progresses that she is hoping that Ethel is a younger version of Esmerelda. And she is, to an extent, she is clearly intelligent, and very studious, equalling her sister's result in the written exam, but it is in the practical when Hecate's gradually building approval dissipates. The girl is over-confident, arrogant and has a nasty streak, reminding Hecate of the girls who used to sit behind her in potions at Witch Training College and throw ingredients at her head. Hecate could tell that her intellect was not as a result of fascination and dedication to the craft, but as a result of wanting to belittle others. The complete opposite her of her self-motivated, humble older sister.

Ethel's difficult start to the school year distracts Esmerelda, she stops asking for extra work from Hecate in their weekly lesson and does not push her boundaries past those Hecate sets for her. She is still brilliant of course, but her full steam ahead progress is slowed slightly, especially when Ethel manages to get herself into trouble. However, she can't help but be impressed, and a little relieved, when Esmerelda pitches the first-year coven to herself and Ada with assurances that she knew all the necessary spells to get it up and running and grand ideas about how it would bring the first-years together, and it works… for a week or two, and then Mildred and Ethel are back at each other's throats again.

* * *

When Hecate is woken in the middle of the night by a frantic banging on her door, panic envelopes her, taking her right back to her final days at Witch Training College. Throwing on her dressing gown and stuffing her feet into slippers, she throws the door open, eyes ready to shoot daggers at the person who had startled her in that way at this hour.

"Esmerelda," she breathes, the sight of the tall blonde girl in tears outside of her door sending a strike of fear through her heart, "What's wrong? What's happened?"

"It's Agatha, she's here" Esmerelda says, her voice trembling, tears streaming down her cheeks, Hecate's chest seizes.

"Where?" she demands, gripping Esmerelda's upper arm tightly.

"I-I don't know," Esmerelda stammers, fighting to control her tears,

"What do you mean you don't –" she hisses, but Esmerelda ploughs on,

"I-I thought she was Miss Cackle, so I invited her in. She told me that Agatha had stolen her powers and she needed someone to give her their magic so she could stop Agatha from taking over the school, a-and Ethel said that she would do it but I-I couldn't let her give up her magic, so I volunteered in her place and oh _god_ Miss Hardbroom I am such a _fool_."

Hecate holds up a hand, silencing the girl, staring at her in disbelief, shocked that _Esmerelda Hallow_ of all people had fallen for one of Agatha's traps. "So, you mean to tell me, that Agatha is within these walls right now, with your powers?"

Esmerelda nods once, tears spilling down her cheeks.

"Stay here," she says firmly, snapping her fingers and instantly changing her outfit, "I'm going to fetch Miss Cackle,"

"It's no use," Esmerelda says, shaking her head dejectedly, as Hecate moves to transfer herself from the room, "Agatha's trapped her in that painting in her office, and Miss Gullet is standing guard, there's no way you'll get past her."

" _Miss Gullet?_ " Hecate exclaims, realisation washing over her as to how Agatha must have escaped Darkwood Cottage in the first place. Esmerelda nods sadly, sobs still bubbling forth. Hecate moves back towards her, unsure of what to do in a situation such as this. Her adrenaline was pumping, Agatha was in the school and Ada was trapped inside a painting, yet the sight of her star pupil standing before her, tears cascading down her cheeks seemed to soften her fight or flight response. She puts an arm gingerly around Esmerelda's shoulders before drawing the girl into her, and to her surprise Esmerelda latches on, sobs racking her body. "Oh Esmerelda," she says, her heart breaking, "what have you done?"

* * *

Hecate cries when she hears that Esmerelda won't be returning to Cackles for the new school year. Not because she's shocked, or even slightly surprised, no she knew the consequences of Esmerelda's decision from the moment the girl had told her what she had done. She cries because she feels responsible, because she should have been looking out for the one student that was her responsibility. She cries because she thought that she was able to protect them all, to set them up for bright futures, but she had inevitably ruined the lives of one of her pupils, just like she knew she would.

It's a few weeks into term when Ada gingerly brings up the fact that Hecate does not have a student to tutor, and Hecate is all stammers and excuses when she tries to respond to Ada, a shock to her headmistress who was used to carefully thought out, witty replies from the potions mistress. It's only when Miss Mould, the new namby-pamby art teacher suggests that she tutor Mildred Hubble does she snap back to reality.

"Absolutely not," she says dismissively, looking at Marigold incredulously over Ada's shoulder.

"Why not?" Marigold asks, defiantly, "She has talent, that girl."

Hecate snorts, "What she has, is a complete lack of magical control and a penchant for disaster."

Marigold opens her mouth to speak but Ada, perhaps wisely, cuts her off, "How about Felicity Foxglove?" she says with a smile, "She's very intelligent, top marks, shows a lot of potential."

Hecate gives a half nod, "She is intelligent, yes, but she is far too distracted by _fashion_ and the latest trends. She would suit Pentangle's Academy nicely."

Ada studies her for a second, almost as if she was second guessing what she was about to say, "What about Ethel Hallow?"

Hecate draws her breath in sharply as she feels all eyes in the room turn to her. She stands quickly, gathering her books, "I will not ruin the life of another Hallow," she says dismissively, snapping her fingers and feeling the familiar squeezing sensation of the transference spell envelope her.

* * *

Initially, she swears she will not take on any more students, she will not allow herself to ruin another life, but as the term drags on, she starts to see more and more of Esmerelda in one of the first years, Clarice Twigg. She dismisses it at first, partly reminding herself of the fire that Clarice, Beatrice and Sybil had caused in the second week, and partly glad that one of the hyperactive young girls paid full attention in her classes. She kept an eye on the head of year one though, kept track of her test scores (all above 95%) and observed her interactions with her friends, on whom she was thankfully a good academic influence if anything. Slowly but surely, Clarice Twigg began to win her over.

"Miss Hardbroom, I've prepped for a lesson on duplicating a small animal, and you give us cheese?" Clarice protests in a potions lesson during the second half of term. Hecate's eye twitched at the memory of why her first years were having to duplicate food items.

"The second years have used up the ingredients for animal duplication, they'll have everything replenished by the end of the day. Whereupon you'll be able to do double the work, Clarice Twigg," she says, moving towards Clarice's cauldron and away again as she spoke. Clarice's eyes lit up as she reassured the eleven-year-old that she would indeed be able to perform an animal duplication spell.

"Great!" she hears Clarice say eagerly from behind her back and she ponders for a second as to whether the girl was being sarcastic or not. She settles on the latter, preferring to genuinely believe that this girl was interested in what she had to teach. She keeps a close eye on Clarice for the rest of the lesson, watches how she diligently chops her ingredients, and triple checks the recipe before putting them in her cauldron, watches her smoothly counteract an over pour of slime of a slug with a sap of a honeysuckle, watches her complete a perfect duplication, fifteen minutes before her classmates, before eagerly jumping up to assist Beatrice Bunch and Sybil Hallow, talking calmly and matter-of-factly as she did. Hecate battles with herself internally, surely to take Clarice on so shortly after Esmerelda would do the girl a disservice, she wasn't sure if she wanted to take on another pupil, wasn't sure if she was a good fit to be a personal tutor rather than a class teacher after all. Before she knows what's happening, the bell is ringing and the girls are packing up. She watches as Clarice, Beatrice and Sybil chat together, smiling as they did so. She turns to look at the shelf of potions ingredients behind her, still fighting as to whether she would submit the idea of Clarice Twigg as her next protégée to Ada.

"Esme!" the cry of the name she hadn't heard in months from the lips of the youngest Hallow caused her to wheel around just in time to see Sybil throw herself into Esmerelda's arms. She draws her breath in sharply at the sight of Esmerelda in her classroom once more. The girl looks older, more worn, and her eyes, normally so full of wonder and intrigue, were dull and sad, not matching the smile that was plastered across her face at the sight of her younger sister. Before she knows what, she's doing, she has walked across her classroom and is looking face to face at the girl she failed.

"Well met, Esmerelda," she says and Esmerelda looks back at her nervously.

"Well met, Miss Hardbroom."

"And to what do we owe this pleasure?" she asks evenly, hoping that she was here to see her, because she wants nothing more than to tell Esmerelda how sorry she was for failing her.

"I came to see my sisters, and hopefully, Miss Cackle," Esmerelda says, smiling the same sad smile at the thrilled looking Sybil. Hecate's heart sinks, of course, she must miss her sisters. She should be here with them, learning and becoming the best witch she could possibly be.

"Ethel is off site at the moment, doing a task I've set for her… but I will tell Miss Cackle that you are here." she says, wondering if this was it, if Esmerelda's parents had finally realised that she had failed her duty of care to their daughter. She snaps her fingers, stepping effortlessly into Ada's office.

"Hecate," Ada says, looking up at her with a smile on her face, "What is it?"

"Esmerelda Hallow is here," she says softly, "She'd like to speak with you."

Ada looks shocked at first, and then looks sadly at Hecate, "I thought this day might come. Bring her here to me."

"Are you sure, Ada? Her parents are on the council."

Ada nods, "I'm sure, the girl gave up her powers for me. I must speak to her properly."

Hecate nods, transferring herself back to her potions lab, "Miss Cackle will see you now." She half expects Esmerelda to transfer herself there before remembering with a heart-wrenching pang why the girl was here in the first place.

They walk in silence to Ada's office, Hecate opening the door and letting Esmerelda in before her, stepping off to the side as Ada did what she did best. Hecate feels her heart crack into a million pieces inside her chest as she listens to Esmerelda, her top student, insist that she was fine when she was so clearly not, watched her admit with sad eyes that she didn't fit in, that she doesn't understand how everything works, that life without her magic was like having all the colours drained away. She feels tears build up inside her as Ada attempts to comfort Esmerelda, obviously heartbroken for her as well. Guilt overwhelms her, consumes her as her ex-student and her headmistress converse. And before she knows what's happening, Esmerelda is asking to come back, as a part of the staff, to take some sort of role at Cackles.

"You want a job?" Hecate asks, the shocked words tumbling from her mouth before she could stop them. Esmerelda looks at her, tears welling in her eyes, and nods earnestly. And Hecate's heart breaks all over again for her, she could not imagine how lonely Esmerelda must be and how awful she felt being outcast from the magical world, of course she wanted to come back, to be around her people. Ada sends Esmerelda out of the room with the promise to discuss the issue with Hecate. She sees the hope in Esmerelda's eyes as she passes her on her way out and Hecate knows that even though everything within her wants to give Esmerelda a position as her assistant, she knew she couldn't, for Esmerelda's sake.

"You know she can't work here," she says to Ada, the words coming out slightly more forcefully that she wanted them to. Ada looks back at her desperately, flicking through the thick volume that Hecate knew contained guidelines from the Magic Council.

"There might be a precedent… something."

"Ada, I'm not talking about statutes and rules," the emotion she had been holding down since laying eyes on Esmerelda again bubbling forth slightly, "I mean it would be torture for Esmerelda."

Ada stops flicking abruptly, sighing and closing the book. She glanced sadly up at the painting on the wall in which she and Hecate had been trapped the previous year. "That girl gave up her magic for me, and all I've done is let her down." Ada says dejectedly. Tears spring to Hecate's eyes as Ada voices the feelings she has been battling with since Esmerelda showed up at her room that fateful night after Agatha had tricked her into giving away her powers. After Agatha had permanently altered not just Esmerelda's life, but the lives of those around her. It all came back to Agatha. She swallows the lump that rises in her chest.

"The only person to blame for this, is Agatha," Hecate says, a type of rage she's never felt before beginning to boil in the pit of her stomach. And for the first time since it happened, she felt as though she was not fully responsible for Esmerelda's predicament. Ada looks back at the painting.

"Agatha might listen to reason," Ada muses. Alarm bells go off in Hecate's head at these words, her heart beat quickening as she remembers the previous term, when she had been forced to go along with Agatha's plans in order to help save the school. She moves to stand between Ada and the painting, lest she make a snap decision, "Surely it's worth a try?" Ada says desperately, knowing her deputy's stance just from her facial expression.

"Agatha would never restore Esmerelda's magic, it would end in disaster. This school, and all the witches in it, is your life. I won't let you risk it, not even for Esmerelda Hallow." she says, hoping, praying that Ada would not try to reason with her sister. They hold eye contact for a moment, both witches reading the other's expression. Hecate could tell that Ada knew how much she had cared about Esmerelda, how much she had invested in the girl, and how much it was hurting her to think rationally in a situation such as this rather than do everything possible to bring Esmerelda back where she belonged.

"You're right, Hecate," Ada says sadly, breaking the eye contact, "You're always right."

* * *

Hecate's heart is still bleeding for her past student even after the events of the day had concluded, her maturity and understanding when Ada had told her there were no positions here for her was admirable, and Hecate wanted nothing more than to give the girl her own powers just so she could come back and live amongst them once more. She toys with the idea of mirroring Esmerelda, just to talk but decides it would be a bit strange, especially after her encounter with Mr Hallow that afternoon. Instead she settles for writing a letter, because she needs to tell Esmerelda how unbelievably sorry she is, she needs to give the girl _something_ if she cannot do her job as her tutor.

 _Esmerelda,_

 _I hope you don't mind my contacting you in this manner. It was lovely to see you today, and I'm sure your sisters were very grateful for your stopping by to see them. I am so very sorry we cannot find a place for you here at Cackles, I know you would put everything you had into any position, however the regulations of the school do not allow it. However, this is not the only reason I am writing. I need to tell you how unspeakably sorry I am for allowing this to happen to you in the first place. My job as your tutor was to equip you for situations such as this, and my job as a teacher was to protect you from harm whilst in my care, and I have failed on both accounts. You are an extremely promising student, Esmerelda and whilst I cannot bring you back into our world, I would not be doing my job as tutor if I did not allow you to continue your education. A friend of mine from school married into a non-magical family, and as such has had to adapt to that lifestyle, her husband runs a prestigious high school very close to where you live, and I have managed to secure you a place there for your senior studies. I am sure that your aptitude for academia will assist you greatly in this transition._

 _I do hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive us for allowing you to fall victim to such dark magic, and please do contact me at any time if you ever need any assistance._

 _I wish you all the best for the future, Esmerelda._

 _Yours Sincerely,_

 _Miss Hardbroom_.

She folds the letter and neatly prints Esmerelda's name on the front, muttering the spell that would take the letter from Cackle's Academy to the Hallows' mailbox as she hears a knock on the door. "Enter," she calls out and Ada steps through the door and into her quarters.

"Hecate," she says softly, "I hope I'm not intruding?"

"Not at all," she says, rising from her desk and slipping her dressing down on, "What can I do for you, headmistress?"

"I just wanted to let you know that if you would prefer not to tutor a student this year, I will not press the matter. It cannot be easy after what happened to Esmerelda." She says sadly, her voice still carrying a note of the pain that it had done earlier when she had spoken to the young girl.

Hecate sighs, "Thank you, Ada, I really do appreciate that." Ada smiles softly and nods, dismissing herself from the room. Relief starts to wash over her, but before Hecate knows what she's doing, she's talking again and Ada is looking beyond pleased at whatever she's just said.

"Clarice Twigg? An excellent decision Hecate, under your instruction she will make a most excellent witch," Ada says almost gleefully.

"Yes," Hecate says, her brain finally catching up to her mouth, "I believe so too."

As Ada retreated happily from her quarters, Hecate sunk down on her bed with her head in her hands, hoping against hope that she would be able to do better for Clarice than she had done for Esmerelda.

* * *

 ** _Author's Note_** _: This idea came to me in the middle of watching Hollow Wood and just WOULDN'T. LEAVE. ME. ALONE. It just gets me so good bc of how emotional Hecate gets when she's around Esmerelda in that ep and this whole world and headcanon of Hecate being her personal tutor just fucking sprang outta nowhere and became this fic. I initially thought I'd made HB a bit OOC, but then I remembered back to my own experience with my HB-esque teacher at high school. She was scary as all get out in the playground and in class but she was my mentor for year 12 and it turns out she was actually lovely and just a total softie that just wanted the best for us which is why I think HB is pretty justified in how upset she is over Esme._

 _BUT yeah, please let me know what you thought!_

 _Love you all_

 _Nay xx_


End file.
